Wednesday, August 31, 2005

Looters in the News



This headline appears in today's "New York Times"


What is it about?

(A) Halliburton's fraud and theft of millions of your tax dollars

(B) Jack Abramoff, Tom Delay and the corruption in culture of corruption they created in Washington

(C) The billions in cash missing in Iraq

(D) The hundreds of tons of weapons Bush let fall into the hands of terrorists

(E) Poverty stricken Americans on the brink of mass death, abanonded by their government

Answer: E

Monday, August 29, 2005


“Rumsfeld said he did not know how to
explain an increase in U.S. casualties in
Iraq from roadside bombs, "other than the
fact that they [insurgents] obviously are
becoming more sophisticated in developing,
in large measure, explosive devices which
have greater lethality."

But he said that while some roadside bombs
have been deadlier, the "overwhelming majority"
of them — about 75 percent — "are not effective
at all" and cause no casualties."

What a relief.


This is what fascism looks like.

“Meeting briefly with reporters Monday aboard Air
Force One, Trent Duffy, a White House spokesman
subbing for Scott McClellan, said that President Bush
believes that those who want the U.S. to begin to
change course in Iraq DO NOT WANT AMERICA TO WIN the
overall "war on terror."

Not that they disagree as to how to win. No. If you
want to change course in Iraq, it’s because you don’t
want to win.

This is, I’m afraid to say, fascism.

Duffy said that Bush "can understand that people don't
share his view that we must win the war on terror, and
we cannot retreat and cut and run from terrorists, but
he just has a different view. He believes it would be
a fundamental mistake right now for us to cut and run
in the face of terrorism, because if we've learned
anything, especially from the 9/11 Commission Report,
it is that to continue to retreat after the Cole,
after Beirut and Somalia is to only empower terrorists
and to give them more recruiting tools as they try to
identify ways to harm Americans.”

It was Ronald Reagan who scampered out of Beirut.

And Bush based his entire "foreign policy" of his 2000 campaign for President on NOT getting U.S. forces involved in, or in places or situatuations like Somalia. "I don't believe in nation building."

What the hell....


Yes, in Iraq right now it looks like every ideal we
may have had is rapidly disappearing in a sandstorm of
political and religious power struggles. In other
words, exactly what I predicted would happen. I’ve
warned over and over that democracy in Iraq would very
likely produce a fundamentalist Muslim government, if
not one actively hostile to the U.S.

And what then?

I also predicted back in 1991 -- yes, really -- that
an occupation would produce a violent armed power
struggle among various political factions jockeying
for power. I based this staggering insight on my
guess that that’s what would happen here if another
country invaded the U.S.

Anyway, both things are happening right now. And it
was only this January, with all the purple fingers,
that things looked so good.

At the State of the Union address, Bush managed a
totally staged “improvised” moment with an Iraqi woman
named Safia Taleb al-Souhail and an American woman
whose son, ironically, was killed in Iraq. All of
America wept as they embraced.

The Washington Post captured it the next day:

“When Norwood started to pull back, the
chain from her son's dog tags, which she
had been holding, became entangled in
al-Souhail's accoutrements. The women had
to disentangle themselves on live television,
the awkwardness lending the moment an
unrehearsed charm. It was, by any measure, magic.”

-- The Washington Post, “The Moment That
America Embraced”, February 4, 2005

Out of the tens of millions of people in Iraq, Bush
had Safia Taleb al-Souhail sit next to Laura Bush to
show how happy Iraqis were that we invaded.
(Admittedly a great improvement over the 2004 guest
Laura had, that crook, Ahmed Chalabi).

And how does Safia Taleb al-Souhail feel now?

"When we came back from exile, we thought
we were going to improve rights and the position
of women. But look what has happened -- we
have LOST all the gains we made over the last
30 years. It's a BIG DISAPPOINTMENT."

--- Safia Taleb al-Souhail, Iraq's ambassador
to Egypt, Reuters interview, August 24, 2005

Oh well. Win some, lose some…



The new visitor's locker room at Iowa's Kinnick
Stadium is entirely pink, even all the urinals. The
tradition was started by in the 1980s by the football
coach Hayden Fry, a former psychology major who hoped
that the unmanly color would weaken visiting teams.

The color scheme has been continued and brightened in
the stadium -- with a color called dubbed "Innocence."

Pretty silly, right?

The Iowa Hawkeyes have won a record 18 straight home


Pat Robertson has already apologized for calling for
the assassination of Hugo Chavez, president of

"If he thinks we're trying to assassinate him,
I think that we really ought to go ahead and do it"

He then compared himself the Protestant theologian,
Dietrich Bonhoffer, who participated in an
unsuccessful plan to assassinate Adolf Hitler:

But the right wing has finally written this cuckoo
off, so maybe I should just drop it.

Then again, there is the Robertson Hit Parade:

This month he prayed to God that "additional vacancies
occur within the Supreme Court."

But aren’t those lifetime appointments? Oh, I get it.

Then there’s my favorite, after September 11th:

Falwell: "What we saw on Tuesday, as terrible as it
is, could be miniscule if, in fact, God continues to
lift the curtain and allow the enemies of America to
give us probably what we DESERVE."

Robertson: "Well, Jerry, that's my feeling. I think
we've just seen the antechamber to terror, we haven't
begun to see what they can do to the major


"The ACLU has got to take a lot of blame for this. And
I know I'll hear from them for this, but throwing
God...successfully with the help of the federal court
system...throwing God out of the public square, out of
the schools, the abortionists have got to bear some
burden for this because God will not be mocked and
when we destroy 40 million little innocent babies, WE

"I really believe that the pagans and the abortionists
and the feminists and the gays and the lesbians who
are actively trying to make that an alternative
lifestyle, the ACLU, People for the American Way, all
of them who try to secularize America...I point the
thing in their face and say you HELPED THIS HAPPEN."

Robertson: "I totally concur.”

Then there’s Pat on Scotland:

“Scotland is a Dark Land. In Scotland, you can't
believe how strong the homosexuals are. It's just

–- Pat Robertson, June 2, 1999.

The funny thing about that was he said at the very
moment his US bank was trying to do a $48 million deal
with the Bank of Scotland.

Said his embarrassed spokesman: "This deal is not
about Pat Robertson, the religious leader. This is
about Pat Robertson, the businessman."

The deal did not go through.

Then there’s his book, “The New World Order” from
1991, where he outlined a plot to impose "a new order
the human race" dating back to 1776, when Bavarian
scholar Adam Weisphaut founded the Order of the
Illuminati a secret society of "atheists and
Satanists" that, Robertson asserts, was dedicated to
"the elevation to world leadership of a group of
hand-picked 'adepts' or `Illuminati'. The still
control the world today.

And he has a new theory on who killed Abraham Lincoln.

"It is my belief that John Wilkes Booth was in the
employ of the European bankers."

That’s Pat.

Finally, there’s Pat views on the Equal Rights

I’ve always loved this quote:

"The work of a secret feminist agenda
that is not about equal rights for women.
It is about a socialist, anti-family political
movement that encourages women to leave
their husbands, kill their children, practice
witchcraft, destroy capitalism and become

–– Pat Robertson.


Speaking of embarrassing screw ups, Fox News (who
else?) now admits it wrongly labeled some innocent
Americans and terrorists.

On August 7, John Loftus, a former U.S. prosecutor,
(all around nut?) said that a man living in the U.S.
named Iyad K. Hilal, was the leader of a terrorist
group with ties to those responsible for the July 7
bombings in London.

He then gave out the man’s home address, on

Fox News also put satellite photos of the house and

Trouble is, the guy had moved out three years ago.

Randy and Ronnell Vorick live there now. Oops.

Of course, they’ve been harassed, yelled at, and
threatened every day since then.

Last weekend, someone spray-painted "Terrist" on their

Loftus, the Fox News guy, said he gave out the address
to help local police.

As one blogger put it: “Tip for former prosecutor
Loftus: if you want to help the police, call the

And as another blogger wrote:

"Terrist." That pretty much sums
up what you need to know about the
Fox News audience, doesn't it?



Having seen his body language this week, especially in
Idaho, I think Bush might finally be losing it.

Here’s Bush on why war is hopeful:

“And the reason why that's important is, is that we've
had a -- we had a policy that just said, let the
dictator stay there, don't worry about it. And as a
result of dictatorship, and as a result of tyranny,
resentment, hopelessness began to develop in that part
of the world, which became the -- gave the terrorists
capacity to recruit. We just cannot tolerate the
status quo. We're at war. And so this is a hopeful

Got that?

Here’s Bush on women’s rights:

Question: “If it's rooted in Islam, as it seems it
will be, is that still -- is there still the
possibility of honoring the rights of women?”


“I talked to Condi, and there is not -- as I
understand it, the way the constitution is written is
that women have got rights, inherent rights recognized
in the constitution, and that the constitution talks
about not "the religion," but "a religion."
Twenty-five percent of the assembly is going to be
women, which is a -- is embedded in the constitution.”

Oh, ok. “A religion.” Could be anything. Wicca,
Anglican, Scientology….

Here he is telling everyone the Sunnis will accept the

Bush: “I will tell you I spoke with Secretary Rice
twice this morning, who has been in touch with our
ambassador on the ground. And she is hopeful that
more and more Sunnis will accept the constitution.
Again, I repeat to you that we're watching an amazing
event unfold, and that is the writing of a
constitution which guarantees minority rights, women's
rights, freedom to worship, in a part of the world
that had only -- in a country that had only known

Ok, nothing he said there is true.

The Constitution DOES NOT guarantee women’s rights or
other minority rights.

The Iraqis set a deadline of midnight Friday to agree
to a Constitution.

It was rejected by the Sunnis.



Cindy Sheehan has really gotten to Bush. Even though
she wasn’t even still there, he fled Texas for Idaho –
on vacation from his vacation? – to find another
Mother who could talk about how proud she is to have
her sons in Iraq. Of course, they’re all still alive.

Here’s Bush on the anti-Cindy:

“There are few things more difficult in life than
seeing a loved one go off to war, and here in Idaho, a
mom named Tammy Pruitt knows that feeling six times

"Tammy has four sons serving in Iraq right now with
the Idaho National Guard, Eric, Evan, Greg, and Jeff.
Last year, her husband Leon and another son Aaron
returned from Iraq where they helped train Iraqi
firefighters in Mosul."

"Tammy says this, -- and I want you to hear this -- I
know that if something happens to one of the boys,
they would leave this world doing what they believe,
what they think is right for our country. And I guess
you couldn’t ask for a better way of life than giving
it for something you believe in?"

"America lives in freedom because of families like the

I have a few reactions to this fascist nuttiness.

First, this is what I’ve been saying for more than a
year now. American is slowly making a transition from
an upstart former British colony bound by certain
Democratic ideals like "Free Speech" and "Government
of the People" to a more traditional, Asian or
European-style country, bound by national codes like
Church, Nationalism, Patriotism, Language, the Flag,
and of course, Militarism.

This, ironically, at a time when Europe has itself
matured and moved on to a Post-Nationalism existence,
whle the Middle East is just beginning it’s
Post-Colonial Phase.

Also, I really can’t think of anything so ridiculous
as to announce that you would be happy to have a child
die for your country, except, perhaps, that you don’t
know why, just that they were “doing what they
believe” and “what is right for our country.”

Finally, you have to see the live footage of this
speech to get the full effect. Bush is not emotive,
or weepy, like he sometimes is. He is very
aggressive. He is shouting. This is meant as a
direct slap at Cindy Sheeehan.

The chilling part is where he pauses, for no reason,

What the hell does that even mean?

When he says the last line, he is practically yelling
and pounding the podium.

It was truly bizarre.


Monday, August 22, 2005

Public Opinion Turns Against Bush

The month of August is definitely seeing a distinct change in public attitudes and coverage of Bush and the war...

This from CNN coverage of Bush's rall-round-the-flag speech at the VFW:

"Between 400 and 500 people gathered at an anti-war rally in Pioneer Park, about three blocks from the Salt Palace where Bush spoke. "It's like Vietnam all over again, and I opposed that, too," said George Muller of Salt Lake City, a retired Air Force lieutenant colonel dressed in desert fatigues.

Muller, who said he served from 1961-2002, said that he was pleased to see so many people at the rally, and that he believed there has been a shift in the country's attitude toward the war.

"That's what it's going to take -- veterans groups, veterans and mothers who have lost kids speaking out," Muller said."

Tuesday, August 16, 2005

The Lie About Senator Clinton

Either you believe in a Culture of Truth, or you don't.

Some radical right wing sites have dredged up a story that first started going around right after Hillary Clinton was sworn in. That she had refused to meet with a group of visiting Gold Star Mothers, and was the only politician to do so. of coure, this is just the sort of story her enemies love, but if you know anything about Hillary Clinton, you know how silly it is.

The headline of the hoax stories reads:

Hillary Snubs Gold Star Mothers

"New York chapter president Shirley Jones and member Mary Wheeler, both of upstate New York, told Behan they had been in Washington visiting Senate offices. The only office that refused to meet with the Gold Star Mothers was none other than New York Senator Hillary Clinton. She and her staff simply refused to meet with them."

The real organizationhas put out a statement reading:

"The American Gold Star Mothers, Inc., deeply regret the misunderstanding about Senator Hillary Clinton. The two mothers who visited Washington did not have an appointment with the Senator and she was not in her office on that day. We would appreciate it if the e-mails and negative comments about Senator Clinton would cease."

What else is there left to say?

Of course, this old, debunked hoax has new relevance with the Cindy Sheehan Vigil continuing, although it seems odd to repeat a false story about Hillary refusing to meet with mothers of veterans and in the same breath defend the President for (really) doing the very same thing.

Monday, August 15, 2005


Scientists discovered last week that all cats have a
genetic defect.

Cats lack the ability to taste sweet carbohydrates.
The genetic defect is common to both domestic cats and
their wild cousins, like tigers and cheetahs.

"That's why the cat is SO CRANKY. The big cats have
to hunt down all this food, and they don't even have
any sweet dessert. No wonder they're always roaring."

Well, I’m glad there’s a reason.

I like this part:

"We spent about THREE YEARS trying
to track down why cats cannot taste sweet."

–– Joseph G. Brand, associate
director at the Monell Chemical
Senses Center in Philadelphia.

Time well spent, I’m sure.


The term “rocky start” was made for Jeanine Pirro’s
announcement that she’s running against Hillary.

First, she had a horrifically long 32 second pause
while she frantically hunted for a piece of paper. It
made her look foolish and was the lead story here the
next day. Then in her press conference, she could not

* Whether she would take money from her husband

* Why her husband’s picture was not one of 103 photos
on her web site

* How much money eliminating the estate tax and
continuing the tax cuts would add to the federal budget

* Whether she would withdraw troops from Iraq

* Whether Lebanon is a democracy

* Her own position on abortion

Her excuse:

“It's my first day on the campaign.”

Also her last?


The Australian National Rugby Team filled out
questionnaires as part of a team bonding session this
week, which were leaked to the media. What question
were they asked?

(A) “Why do you like rugby?”

(B) “What is your favourite non-sporting activity?”

(C) “What historical figure would you like to meet?”

(D) “How do you think the team could improve?”

(E) “Which teammate would you eat if we were forced to
resort to cannibalism?”

Answer: E

Actually, I'm paraphrasing - I don't the exact question asked.
Whatever it was, the quiz was inspired by the Uruguayan
rugby team which crashed in the Andes in 1972,
and inspired the movie “Alive,' with Ethan Hawke.

One player said that he would chose a particular
teammate for dessert because, he reasoned, "The amount
of sweets he puts in, it's got to rub off in his meat

Definitely something you need to know AHEAD of time.


Jake Pokonosky finished 72nd among more than 500
swimmers on during the 10th annual Alcatraz
Invitational, a 1.2-mile swim from the island to San

What is unusual about Jake Pokonosky?

(A) He once tried to escape from Alcatraz by swimming.

(B) He’s 93 years old.

(C) He was bitten by a shark halfway through the race.

(D) He’s the United States Secretary of State for
Far Eastern Affairs.

(E) He’s a Golden Retriever.

Answer: E

“Jake was the only non-human in Sunday's 1.2-mile swim
from the infamous prison island to the San Francisco
shore. The 65-pound Golden Retriever swam across the
cold, choppy water in a time of 41 minutes and 45

Organizers from the South End Rowing Club which puts
on the annual event say it was the first known
crossing of the water by a dog. The crowd cheered as
Jake made his way onto solid ground, shook off water
and dodged a woman who tried to put a medal around his


Why did Rush Limbaugh say Paul Hackett went to Iraq?

(A) To “fight for freedom”

(B) To “liberate people”

(C) To “save America”

(D) To “stop terrorism”

(E) To “pad his resume”

Answer: E

Why? Because Hackett is a Democrat, of course.

Hackett’s response:

“That's typical for that fat ass drug addict to come
up with something like that.”

"I went to Iraq because I wanted to serve my country
and be with my Marines. Ask him why his phone lines
were clogged up. That's because he was getting
thousands of calls from veterans from this war and
other wars who were clogging up his phone lines,
giving him an earful."

“I was on drill this weekend, I've got to tell you, he
lost a lot of Republican supporters with his

Baghdad Mayor Deposed in Coup

"BAGHDAD, Iraq, Aug. 9 - Armed men entered Baghdad's
municipal building during a blinding dust storm on
Monday, deposed the city's mayor and installed a
member of Iraq's most powerful Shiite militia."

You read that right. Armed men deposed the Mayor
of Baghdad in a violent coup this week. What’s
interesting is that they claim they have to right to
do it, because they won elections in January.

I don’t know what’s going on. But it does seem like
Iraq is sliding into civil war.

Too Much Time on His Hands?

According to a story dated August 12, 2005, in
Canberra, Shane Willmott is working with mice.
Training them, to be specific.

To surf.

“He has trained three mice, named Harry, Chopsticks
and Bunsen, to surf small waves on tiny mouse-size
surf boards at beaches on the country's Gold Coast.
The mice are put through rigorous bathtub training and
then some have their fur dyed when it is time to hit
the beach.”

"Usually if he is surfing big waves, I usually colour
his hair up. Because he's white, when he gets in the
whitewash it's hard to find him," Willmott said.

Harry, Chopsticks and Bunsen live in miniature
custom-made villas and own specially made jet skis.”

Is there no end to the benefits of a sound graduate


Of course it’s well known that Hindus respect, if not
actually worship, cows. And that cows wander the
streets. And that they’re pretty big. It’s also
well-known that India is a center of high-tech.

Thankfully, these two phenomena have met each other
and presented a solution.

Authorities in New Delhi have started inserting
microchips into cows to tackle the problem of cattle
roaming freely in the streets, officials said on
Thursday, August 11.

The move came after the Delhi High Court slammed civic
authorities this month for failing to round up cows --
considered holy by Hindus.

There are an estimated 35,000 cows and buffalo in the
capital and its surrounding areas.

"Now with a microchip in them, cows can be caught more
quickly," said one official.

Now if we could only do same thing with politicians….

Thursday, August 11, 2005

Bush Cousins Endorsed Kerry

With all this talk about Cindy Sheehan's alleged cousins and who knows who else allegedly signing some letter with the usual crap - support our troops, when what they mean is, worship George Bush - it's worth noting all the Bush cousins who endorsed John Kerry.

They even created a web site,

Their slogan was: 'Because blood is thicker than oil!"

They wrote:

''As the election approaches, we feel it is our responsibility to speak out about why we are voting for John Kerry, and to do our small part to help America heal from the sickness it has suffered since George Bush was appointed President in 2000. We invite you to read our stories, and please, don't vote for our cousin!"

They were all apparently related to Prescott Bush, George W's grandfather.

The Texas and New England sides of the families are not all that close.

''I can't describe us as particularly close to the Bush family," said one cousin.

''I've never met George W. Bush and don't particularly care to."

Wednesday, August 10, 2005

Who Are Orville and Wilbur Pirro?


Who are Orville and Wilbur Pirro?

(A) Jeanine Pirro's other husbands - the ones not convicted of tax evasion

(B) Al Pirro's brothers - also convicted and sentenced to prison

(C) Al and Jeanine's adorable children

(D) A standup comedy team in Westchester, devoted to mocking the Pirros

(E) Pigs

Answer: E

They are the couple's pot bellied pigs, for which the Pirro's built a very expensive wrought iron pen, and which they then illegally deducted from the taxes.

Administration to Celebrate September 11

It's official: The Administration is planning to throw a party on September 11th.

I've long said here and elsewhere that the Administration still cannot figure out whether they think Sept. 11th was one of the worst says in U.S. history or one of the greatest. From the way they constantly want to remind you that Bush was President on that day, and with constant references to the day, you would think that that the day the U.S. won the lottery or something.

Clearly, all evidence, speeches, policies, suggest that they do believe that Sept. 11 was a great day.

And to show how they feel, how grateful they are for 9/11, they are going to have a big party.

According to news reports:

"The Pentagon would hold a massive march and country music concert to mark the fourth anniversary of the September 11 terrorist attacks, US Defence Secretary Donald Rumsfeld said in an announcement tucked into an Iraq war briefing today."

"This year the Department of Defense will initiate an America Supports Your Freedom Walk," Rumsfeld said, adding that the march would remind people of "the sacrifices of this generation and of each previous generation".

"The march will start at the Pentagon, where nearly 200 people died on September 11, 2001, and end at the National Mall with a show by country star Clint Black."

"I've never heard of such a thing," said John Pike, who has been a defence analyst in Washington for 25 years and runs

People were also confused by the link beween Iraq and 9/11.

"That piece of it is disturbing since we all know now there was no connection," said Paul Rieckhoff, an Iraq veteran who heads Operation Truth, an anti-administration military booster. "I think it's clear that their public opinion polls are in the toilet," he said.

Well, the important thing is march around, show your support, and watch other people sacrifice.

Friday, August 05, 2005


The Right wing just can’t seem stop bashing combat
veterans. First it was Max Cleland, then Wes Clark,
then John Kerry and the infamous purple band aids.

What did Rush Limbaugh call all U.S. soldiers serving
in civilian areas – that is, the most dangerous areas?

A “Staff Puke”.

Really. In fact, he said it several times.

Have all the drugs gone to his head? Has the evil in
him just started to ooze out?

This is a guy, who -- I am not kidding -- got out of
Vietnam because he had a large pimple on his rear end.

He said it in reference to Paul Hackett the Major
running for Congress in Ohio, but he said in reference
to position he held, not to him personally.

Limbaugh was talking to an Navy officer
who called into his radio show. Rush asked what "civilian" affairs
officers do. The guy said they liaison with the local authorities.

"So he wasn't in combat," said Limbaugh

The guy said right, then Limbaugh said “so he was
just a STAFF PUKE.”

So Limbaugh's slur applies to everyone with that job, which happens
to be extremely important and hazardous.

These people make me sick.


This Time, We're Stuck With Bush


“It’s tempting to play the Retreat From
GWOT for laughs, but I can't help
remembering an exchange between
President Kennedy and Gen. Curtis
LeMay during the Cuban missile crisis,
as the United States and the Soviet Union
came as close as they ever came to nuclear war.

The general said, "You're in a pretty bad
fix, Mr. President." The president shot back,
"You're in there with me."

–– Ruth Walker, The Christian Science
Monitor, August 4, 2005

Question of the Week

Tucked into the egregious pork-laden energy bill
enacted last week was a provision to ease U.S. export
restrictions on:

(A) Sugar

(B) Solar Panels

(C) Electric cells

(D) Soy-based fuel

(E) Hybrid vehicles

(F) Weapons Grade Uranium

Answer: F

From the Washington Post:

“A provision tucked into the 1,724-page energy bill
that Congress is poised to enact today would ease
export restrictions on bomb-grade uranium, a lucrative
victory for a Canadian medical manufacturer and its
well-wired Washington lobbyists.”

“The Burr Amendment -- named for its sponsor, Sen.
Richard Burr (R-N.C.) -- would reverse a 13-year-old
U.S. policy banning exports of weapons-grade uranium
unless the recipients agree to start converting their
reactors to use less-dangerous uranium.”

Just so we’re clear:

The Republican will sell out American security for
money, and the company that benefits isn’t even


File the whole Rafael Palmiero thing under “You Can’t
Make This Stuff Up.”

Jose Canseco, who was a big star in the early 1990s,
writes this explosive book about how all these guys in
baseball are using steroids, and names names,
including Mark McGuire. Then they all get hauled
before Congress, and testify under oath.
Surprisingly, although he looks like the Missing Link,
Canseco comes across well, while McGuire refuses to
talk and Sammy Sosa suddenly can’t speak English.

Then there’s Rafael Palmiero, who was named by Canseco
has having used steroids in 1992. He came across very
well, looking every bit the future Republican
politician he is (or was). He (again, under oath)
wagged his finger and said "I have never used
steroids. Period."

This was in March. This week it was announced that in
May, Palmiero had tested positive for a very powerful
steroid called stanozolol. That’s what they caught
Ben Johnson using in 1988. It’s supposed to leave
your system in a month.

Everybody, even Palmiero, possibly, was stunned.

I mean, what are the chances that Jose Canseco would
name the ONE guy, who more than a decade later, would
test positive? This seems to be Raffy’s defense, too.
I mean, he also just got his 3,000 hit a few days
ago. What are the odds?

Said one Congressman: "You've got to remember -- of
all the people who testified, he was probably the most
convincing. So if you asked me who would they catch,
and I were listing a thousand ballplayers, he would be
No. 1,000."

Well, now Congress is looking to charge Palmiero with
perjury. Cause they have noooooothing better to do.

They’ve subpoenaed his test results, everything.

"It's hard for me to reconcile that someone doesn't
know that they have steroids in their body. I'm
extraordinarily skeptical," said committee member Rep.
Christopher Shays, R-Conn.

Funny, but one his defenders is Jose Canseco, who
thinks it must be leftover from a while ago. No way
is Raffy that stupid, he said.

By the way, Jose is currently featured in the reality
show, “The Surreal Life.” He’s the brightest one



Yes, the President really issued this statement AFTER
Palmiero tested positive:

“Well, Rafael Palmeiro is a friend.
He’s the kind of person that’s going to
stand up in front of the klieg lights and
say he didn’t use steroids, and I believe
him. And I still do.”

-- George W. Bush

As "The Daily Show" says, Bush’s lives in world of his
own making. And it’s a nice world.



Oh, how we have longed for this day!

It was an orgiastic blogosphere yesterday, as the most
hated man in America, the Prince of Darkness himself,
Bob Novak, had a meltdown on live TV.

CNN host Ed Henry had on Novak and James Carville to
banter about the day’s events.

But he very cleverly placed a huge copy of “Who’s Who
in America” right in front of Novak. With a Post-It
Note strategically placed.

Novak cited the book in a column published this
Monday, meant to exonerate himself, (and Rove)
suggesting he got Valerie Plame’s name from the book.
But did he check the book? He started sweating as
soon as saw it sitting there.

It’s just like when Tom Cruise brings the airmen into
the courtroom to rattle Jack Nicholson in “A Few Good
Men.” It worked then, too -- he blows a gasket.

Within seconds, with Carville needling Novak over
something trivial, Novak yanked off his microphone and
stormed off the set.


"He's gotta show these right-wingers that he's got
backbone, you know. The Wall Street Journal editorial
page is watching you. Show 'em you're tough."

Novak: "Well, I think that's b******t! I hate that."

Novak to Ed Henry: "Just let it go."

Novak rips off microphone and storms off.

Later, Ed Henry apologized to viewers for Novak's
leaving the set "a little early," and then added this

"I had told him in advance that we were going to ask
him about the CIA leak case. He was not here for me to
be able to ask him about that. Hopefully, we'll be
able to ask him about that in the future."

Guess again.

This is it, people. This is the Right Wing Crack-Up
I’ve been talking about. This revolution will be


Booster Rockets? Check!
Gizmo control? Check!
Hypertechnical stuff? Check!
Outer Space Gadgets? Check!
Duct Tape? Check!

I watched with fascination the liftoff of the
Discovery on the computer, and later watched on live
tv the attempt to manually fix the shuttle by going
outside and “tugging on it.”

They actually had a hacksaw rigged up with duct tape.

Duct tape -- really?

Isn't this a trillion dollar program?

Hey, whatever works. Don’t leave home without it.


Monday, August 01, 2005

Is Robert Novak Really George Costanza?


“I have previously said that I never would have written those sentences if Harlow, then-CIA Director George Tenet or ANYBODY else from the agency HAD TOLD ME that Valerie Plame Wilson's disclosure would endanger herself or anybody.”

- Robert Novak, “The Washington Post”


The Boss:

“It has come to my attention that you and the cleaning woman have engaged in sexual intercourse on the desk in your office. Is that correct?”

George Costanza:

“Was that wrong? Should I have not done that? I tell you, I’ve got to plead ignorance on this thing, because if ANYONE HAD SAID ANYTHING TO ME AT ALL when I first started here, that that sort of thing was frowned upon… you know….cause I've worked in a lot of offices, and I tell you people do that all the time.”

It didn't work for George, either. He was fired.